some thoughts on prayer

If I were to be honest (which is probably the best route), often my prayer life is pretty pathetic. It is a frail old man with spindly arms, hobbling about and shaking his cane at people. Sickly, mostly because I hardly feed him, and embarrassing. In contrast to this image, prayer should be a glorious activity, holy communion with an infinite God who is dying for us to get the picture of His love. That doesn’t mean that it is always easy, but it does mean that there is so much more to it than a 15 minute list of requests with punctuating thank you’s (something my prayer life often reverts to.) Why does this happen? Why do we so often let our prayer life slide? For everybody the answer is different. Probably the best way to figure out is to pray about it. Imagine that! When I am feeling extra wiggly during prayer, it usually means something is going on below the surface that I don’t even realize. Sometimes it is that I really don’t think it will make much of a difference whether I pray or not. I don’t trust God that there is a spiritual battle going on. Especially while I brush my teeth or am stuck in Winton Road traffic. I have a feeling that if we only saw a glimpse of His power and tenderness towards us and our needs, we would be praying constantly, but for whatever reason, He has set it up where there is great spiritual blessings given to the people who seek His face. If you’ve ever noticed, a lot of the Psalms seem like one long verizon wireless commercial, Can you hear me now? Prayer makes us frustrated, but it makes us hungry for more of Him, and often this will drive us closer and closer to His heart, which is really where He wants us to be.
There are tons of other reasons we stop praying, one of the biggest for me is that I start to get embarrassed. So many times, I shy away if it’s been “too long.” Repentance, and turning back toward Him with all that we are and have can be so hard! Perhaps what we need to pray for is more courage, courage to show God our brokenness and to face it ourselves. Sometimes I get so depressed, and I just don’t feeeeel like praying. And so I don’t. And then it’s so hard to come back because He is my strength and I have been disconnecting myself from Him. Sometimes I think it is a miracle that He gives us the grace and strength to come back at all. And the fact that He runs towards us, like in the prodigal son parable, is just outrageous.
So that would be pretty sweet if somehow we could repent turn around and have a solid hour of prayer each day. Confess, worship, give thanks, supplicate, etc. But He wants even more than that as far as our prayer life! Pray continuously!? It is something that we have probably all heard before, but something I think I’ve only been recently starting to understand. One reason that it is so hard to understand or even talk about is that often it is wordless. Often it is an orientation of the heart towards Christ, in recognition of our mutual indwelling. Abide in me, He says, as I abide in you (John 15:4). Colossians 3:3 tells us our lives are now hidden with Christ in God. There are other verses as well that help me to understand the wordless prayer that should be part of our lives. For example, “be still and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). One of my favorites is, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” (Romans 8:26). I know how that feels! I guess the best way I know how to describe wordless prayer is a lover’s gaze on our Beloved, knowing that He looks down on us with a love that is broader than our minds. I think secretly I used to think that people who lived in perpetual adoration of the Lord were probably boring and a little weird. Since then though I have met some brothers and sisters like that, and they are some of the most fun and free people I have ever met. I know it sounds corny, but I leave conversations with them feeling like I’ve just learned how to breathe.
I think I’ve probably been rambling, but some suggestions I have for praying continuously are figure out what roadblocks are in your way to putting yourself before God. Confess them to someone. Set aside time in your day to pray, but remember that a lot of prayer during the day is a blossoming of your heart towards God and an awareness of His presence as you go through your daily activities. Wash dishes for God. Be open to just taking random breaks in what you are doing to just stop and praise Him. I think the Muslim custom of praying 5 times a day and stopping in the middle of whatever they are doing to get on their face to pray is amazing. That kind of pausing our daily activities can really help prioritize our minds and even our bodies (they are so connected!) Send up prayers knowing that your prayers mingle with the saints throughout all time and space. People have been wrestling with prayer since the beginning. You are not alone! Sometimes for me, praying other people’s written prayers is really helpful. It also gets me to pray about things I might not have thought about to pray for. In closing, feel free to comment, to disagree or to add. I would love to hear what you have to say about prayer and what your own prayer life is like. This is a beautiful old prayer written by the Puritans back in the day.

Lord, high and holy, meek and lowly; Thou has brought me to the valley of vision where I live in the depths but see thee in the heights; hemmed in by mountains of sin I behold thy glory. Let me learn by paradox that the way down is the way up; that to be low is to be high, that the broken heart is the healed heart; that the contrite spirit is the rejoicing spirit; that the repenting soul is the victorious soul; that to have nothing is to possess all; that to bear the cross is to wear the crown; that to give is to receive; that the valley is the place of vision. Lord, in the daytime stars can be seen from deepest wells, and the deeper the wells, the brighter thy stars shine. Let me find thy light in my darkness, thy life in my death, thy joy in my sorrow, thy grace in my sin, thy riches in my poverty, thy glory in my valley.